Katie Holmes admits the idea of motherhood initially scared her.
"During the first couple of days [with Suri], we would just sleep right next to her to make sure she was breathing," she tells April's Glamour. "And I was constantly learning on the job, but Tom [Cruise] was very helpful and supportive."
She says it was tough when people began spreading rumors about Suri -- including one that she didn't exist at all -- after Homes gave birth in 2006.
"Some of the stuff [people said] was such absolutely horrible things to say about a child," she says. "It was so uncalled for and so disgusting. Enough is enough."
Cruise told her not to worry about it.
"We were changing diapers. He said, 'I don't want you to get upset,'" Holmes says. "And I said, 'Well, I am upset.'" "So we approached it together," she goes on. "But I definitely felt like — as a woman, as the mother of Suri — I want to handle this! My mom is very strong, and if anyone ever said anything about any of us, she would be, 'Excuse me? That's my family!'"
She adds that she sees "glimpses of Tom and me" in Suri. "She's really such a special girl — strong and funny," Holmes says. "She's her own person. She has a great sense of humor."
Holmes -- who also says, "I'm not pregnant right" -- tells Glamour her family life is normal.
Asked what she wants to say to the people who spread bizarre rumors, Holmes remarks, "Sometimes I think I would say, 'Why don’t you come over and have dinner? See what there is to see.'"
An average day?
"We're all together. We like to be together, so we use the house for our [business] meetings," Holmes says. "[We] play Yahtzee, board games, Scrabble. We grill; have pool parties. We play 'The Three Little Pigs' and Suri is the Big Bad Wolf. [Tom] reads storybooks to Suri, and we all laugh. When a good song comes on, he’ll break out in a dance. We'll watch movies in bed — recently Madagascar and Cinderella, for Suri. We really have a good time."
Cruise even cooks his pasta carbonara.
"He knows exactly how to do it: a pinch of this, a pinch of that. He has a recipe, but he also kind of [improvises] by himself. You have to do the egg at a certain time. He did it once when we were camping," she says.
Holmes admits she hasn't had enough time in the kitchen. "I don't really cook that much — eventually I will," she says. "I do make cupcakes."
The actress -- who is currently shooting the comedy The Extra Man in New York City -- denies that she is overwhelmed by Cruise's over-the-top life.
Says Holmes, "From an early age I knew that I wanted to be in this business. So I did everything I could to get here, and when I met Tom, I knew in an instant that we were going to be together, that we were going to get married. He does have a very big life. And you know, we just do it. And, as a woman, you make that transition from being single to [being] a partner. I have a teammate, and it’s like, we’re going to make this work."
She says their 16-year age difference "was never a concern. I know one would think, Now, how is that? But really, we both like to work, we both like our families. It's being there, being supportive, being an ear. It's not so much, 'Do you think I should do this?' It's 'What do you think of it?'"
She remembers wanting to marry Cruise at an early age.
"When Top Gun came out, my sisters were like, 'Oh, my God, Top Gun! Tom Cruise!'" Holmes says. "And I very confidently said, 'I'm going to marry him one day.' It wasn't like, How do I get to Tom Cruise? It was just: I think I'm going to marry him. Why not? He'll like me. I'm fun."
After having a business meeting in 2005, she says, "We both knew."
As their third wedding anniversary approaches, she says they want to spend it "in Rome, where we got married. It was one of the first places we went together."